I suppose I should provide an update of sorts but the truth is that nothing much is happening. We've got 15 days till Baby Girl's due date and according to our birthmom's last appointment it appears she's content staying put. Baby Girl is measuring right on target, healthy as a horse. Nothing out of the ordinary about this pregnancy.
But I've been feeling a little poopie lately. I've got this dull constant ache near my right ovary that's been going on for almost a month (so no, it's not ovulation). I'm thinking it could be a cyst from my PCOS flaring up but sometimes the pain moves to the middle or the left of my abdomen so I can't be sure. It's annoying but not something I think the doctors would do anything about. Right now I'm just playing the wait-and-see approach.
I'm starting to get a little nervous about placement. There's a 60 day window in which the birthparents could change their mind after placement. After placement, which would occur at the hospital when Baby Girl is discharged, there will be a hearing scheduled within 30 days to terminate parental rights. During the 30 day window before the hearing the birth parents can change their mind for any reason whatsoever. After the hearing they'll then have another 30 days to appeal it though at that point it becomes much harder to regain custody. They would have to prove they signed under duress or that their situations change dramatically enough to warrant the ability to parent. Still, I'm putting our full faith in our birthmom's unwavering decision to place Baby Girl for adoption. I know it will be hard and my heart breaks for her but Brandon and I called the social worker today and let her know that whatever our birthmom needs afterward to help her through this time, we're willing to do it. If she wants to call or visit or even just email back and forth we're okay with that. If she wants distance then our feelings won't be hurt and we'll give her the space she needs. As the days tick closer to Baby Girl's due date I find myself thinking more and more about our birthmom and what she must be going through. Because despite the happiness that will come from adoption there will also be loss, for all parties involved but mostly for the birth parents. I can only hope that their hearts will heal and they will be able to achieve the dreams that they're looking forward to accomplishing.
But I've been feeling a little poopie lately. I've got this dull constant ache near my right ovary that's been going on for almost a month (so no, it's not ovulation). I'm thinking it could be a cyst from my PCOS flaring up but sometimes the pain moves to the middle or the left of my abdomen so I can't be sure. It's annoying but not something I think the doctors would do anything about. Right now I'm just playing the wait-and-see approach.
I'm starting to get a little nervous about placement. There's a 60 day window in which the birthparents could change their mind after placement. After placement, which would occur at the hospital when Baby Girl is discharged, there will be a hearing scheduled within 30 days to terminate parental rights. During the 30 day window before the hearing the birth parents can change their mind for any reason whatsoever. After the hearing they'll then have another 30 days to appeal it though at that point it becomes much harder to regain custody. They would have to prove they signed under duress or that their situations change dramatically enough to warrant the ability to parent. Still, I'm putting our full faith in our birthmom's unwavering decision to place Baby Girl for adoption. I know it will be hard and my heart breaks for her but Brandon and I called the social worker today and let her know that whatever our birthmom needs afterward to help her through this time, we're willing to do it. If she wants to call or visit or even just email back and forth we're okay with that. If she wants distance then our feelings won't be hurt and we'll give her the space she needs. As the days tick closer to Baby Girl's due date I find myself thinking more and more about our birthmom and what she must be going through. Because despite the happiness that will come from adoption there will also be loss, for all parties involved but mostly for the birth parents. I can only hope that their hearts will heal and they will be able to achieve the dreams that they're looking forward to accomplishing.
Christa, I'm so happy to see your dreams coming true!! Your soon to be Birth Mother is going to need a lot of support and time to heal. Blessings in a Basket (http://blessingsinabasket.org/) has an amazing national support group via skype and you can order a basket to be delivered to her hospital room to help make the first couple weeks after placement easier. The group is led and organized by a Birth Mother and is just amazing. xxoo
ReplyDeleteCHRISTA!!!!!!! I am very, very behind in my blog reading because the last post of yours I read mentioned you leaving your blog. I was sad to hear that but now I see that you've been matched and are due any day now. I am SO excited for you guys! Adoption is such an amazing blessing.
ReplyDeleteI know the process at this point becomes pretty nerve-racking. When birth day comes, just be there for M and the rest of us will pray for peace in everyone's hearts with successful placement, termination of rights, and completion of the process to finalization.
PLEASE feel free to email me if you need to talk or have questions or anything (kekis26 at gmail dot com). After our 5.5 year battle to have a biological child, I NOW see why God took us through the awful RPL/IF journey and to our precious baby daughter, Kate. I could go on & on about what an amazing experience our adoption has been. In fact, I'm having a massive deja vu while writing this. (Crazy? Why yes, I am.)
I know I'm rambling, but I am praying for you all and look forward to reading updates about baby Charlotte May. Much love to you.
Okay. Seriously. I am so very happy for you!!!
ReplyDeleteI have been quietly rooting for you for about a year now : ) Hope the next few months go smoothly!
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